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How to Prepare Your Children for Divorce


Amidst the various frustrations, emotions, and stress that adults experience during divorce, it can be easy to lose sight of how this affects our children as well. From a child’s perspective, the divorce of their parents is a tumultuous change that can turn their world upside down and disrupt every routine that they have ever known. This may cause a child to lash out, feel unloved, blame themselves, or experience other unhealthy emotions. Fortunately, parents can help their children cope with this time of transition by communicating several key messages to them beforehand.

If you and your spouse have decided to split, be sure to communicate the following:

  1. Your Separation Is Not Their Fault: It is imperative your let your child know that your split is not their fault. While certain issues that led to your decision to divorce may have involved your child, this does not mean that they are to blame.
  2. You Will Always Love Them: However simple it may sound, telling your children that your love for them has not changed remains to be a powerful message. While you and your spouse may no longer love each other, reassure your child that the love you have for them will never change.
  3. Tell the Truth: It is an inevitability that your child will ask why you are divorcing. The best policy is to be honest. Kids are smart and will be able to tell if you are lying to them. If your children are younger, choose a simple reason, such as “We can’t get along anymore.”
  4. They Are, and Always Will Be, Taken Care of: Change can be frightening and may cause your child to feel as if their safety is in danger. Reassure them that while things will be different, they will always be cared for and their wellbeing will be factored into every decision moving forward.
  5. Let Them Express Their Feelings: Give your child a chance to respond and listen to what they have to say. While you may not agree with them, validating your child’s feelings will help inspire trust and help them cope with the coming changes.

Top-Rated Divorce Advocacy in Dutchess County

If you are approaching a divorce or are already knee-deep in the process, it is vital that you retain knowledgeable legal counsel to ensure your best interests are guarded. At the Law Office of Dennis R. Vetrano, Jr., LLC, our highly trained Dutchess County divorce lawyers have more than four decades of combined legal experience and are equipped with the tools you need to pursue a smooth resolution.

Find out more about what our team of Super Lawyers® can do for you by calling our office today at (845) 605-4330.