Divorce can be a difficult and emotionally draining process, but it doesn't have to be a drawn-out battle. Despite being legally complex, if both parties are committed to focusing on cooperation rather than conflict throughout the separation process, divorcing couples can reach an amicable agreement that works for everyone involved. In this blog post, we'll discuss how you can navigate divorce while preserving mutual respect to avoid long-term discord between your former partner.
What Is an Amicable Divorce?
An amicable divorce or separation is a unique process that requires a tremendous amount of work and effort. It is a civil divorce that doesn’t involve litigation. Both spouses agree to property division, spousal support, child support visitation, and custody. Both parties have to put aside any emotions and seek to reach a mutually beneficial outcome. However, the result of an amicable process can provide long-lasting peace of mind and financial security for everyone involved. Doing so requires strong communication skills, empathy, understanding, and a great deal of patience in order to eventually reach the best possible result in the agreement. With focused effort and determination, it is possible to attain an amicable divorce or separation.
Avoid Placing Blame
Getting divorced is often a difficult and painful process that can leave lasting emotional scars. One of the best ways to ensure that your divorce is as free of conflict as possible is to refrain from placing blame on one another. Even if you each have strong opinions about why things didn’t work out, it’s best to go into the divorce without name-calling, asking family/friends to pick sides, etc. If both parties are capable of approaching the divorce in an objective and reasonable way, then the odds of having an amicable split significantly increase. Though it’s not easy, if you make a conscious choice to avoid accusations, you will be better equipped to explore the possibilities of a happier life and satisfaction after the divorce.
Focus on the End Goal
It is important to decide in advance what issues are most precious to you, and which issues you can let go of. That way, when the time comes for negotiations, you can easily identify the core points needing attention and those that are secondary to the big picture of your life moving forward. It's not easy to be logical in such an emotionally charged situation but staying focused on the main objectives is one of the best ways to get through a divorce peacefully.
Have Good Faith
Good-faith negotiation is the key to a successful divorce. It involves both parties being transparent and honest with all financial information relevant to the divorce proceedings, thus ensuring accuracy and truth. This will prevent any attempts to hide assets or under-report income which can quickly turn any divorce into a stressful and financially ruinous disaster. Fostering an atmosphere of trust by engaging in a good-faith negotiation is the best way for couples to achieve a peaceful resolution.
Avoid Emotional Reactions
It can be difficult to deal with strong emotions during a divorce, but it’s important to remember that it is not the time nor place to let your heart lead instead of your head. Communicating in a positive way and as you would like to be spoken to yourself is essential. Be clear when listing your needs while also maintaining kindness and respect. Divorce is never easy, but things can move along more smoothly if both parties respect each other through words and actions. Try to get the resolution you and your spouse both deserve as expeditiously as possible; this means handling things in an appropriate fashion, so they won’t linger too long.
Set Healthy Boundaries
Going through a divorce or separation can be an incredibly difficult journey and is likely to lead to many changes in your life. As part of this process, it’s also important to consider how your relationship might look going forward. It can be beneficial to try and create a new type of relationship that works both with the current situation and provides support whilst you transition to your post-separation lives. By accepting that things have changed and that there may need to be new boundaries created, you will find yourself far better equipped for creating an arrangement that works for everyone involved.
Practice Gratitude
Working together efficiently and effectively is crucial during any divorce process, and it's especially important if you are either co-parenting children or dealing with mutual finances. One of the best ways to ensure a smoother journey is by showing your appreciation for your ex's efforts at teamwork. Whenever they are considerate and helpful, express gratitude for their input. Doing so will ultimately benefit both parties -- not only will it encourage them to continue participating in an efficient manner, but it also serves as a gesture of respect that can make the entire situation much more reasonable and civilized.
Practicing these habits can help your divorce remain amicable. It is important to also remember that you are human and becoming emotional is normal in these circumstances. Try not to be hard on yourself throughout the process.
Divorce can be a complex and emotional journey for all parties involved. It is important to find an experienced attorney who understands the intricacies of the divorce laws, how to navigate difficult situations, and most importantly make sure that each party is treated fairly and with respect throughout the process if they are pursuing an amicable divorce.
The Law Office of Dennis R. Vetrano, Jr., LLC understands the delicate nature of such a situation. Our office supports clients in collaborative divorce to reach agreements on critical terms within divorce. We are dedicated to help you pursue an amicable divorce experience that leaves both parties feeling supported and respected following the proceedings.
Call today at (845) 605-4330 or schedule an appointment with us online.